Bumblebee Girl on Mission Possible

Posts tagged ‘positive’

Bumblebee girl on mission possible

Something weird has happened – I woke up after a really bad night and weird enough I’ve a peace in me that I haven’t had in many years. It’s so lovely and I really hope it’s there to stay.

I’ve had 1,5 week at home after the toxic reaction and my dyspraxia has freaked out because of it in a way I don’t think ever has happened before. Fortunately there’s normally years between getting a toxic reaction and this time it some medication (lucky me I usually don’t use any medication). But right now I can’t hide my dyspraxia because it’s the motor part and somehow I don’t care any more. It’s who I’m and if people can’t love me or just like me for it, there is nothing I can do about it. It’ll come out and people will see it so shit happens and as a mate back from school send me a quote on – Wabi Sabi – I’m just finding the beauty in my imperfection and accepting the natural cycleย  ๐Ÿ˜‰

I know I’ve amazing people walking beside me like my PT, my surf trainer, “The 101 things to do when you survive”-gang some of my colleagues and friends around the world (and yes I don’t have friends like that here but I’ve friends who are only a phone call or a text away).

So with a little help from some of my dear friends the last days, I’m starting a new chapter of my life which we call Bumblebee girl on mission possible. Mission possible is somehow being allowed to immigrate to Australia.

It will take time because instead of pushing it all, I’ll start working with the flow taking on decision at a time and take one step. Then see where I’m and then take a decision from that perspective. I shouldn’t be surprised if this process actually works fasterย  ๐Ÿ˜€

I’ve been so desperate to emigrate away from the cold and Norway that it became a fight but it’s should be a positive walk towards making my dreams come though ๐Ÿ™‚

Now I’ll wash my face (cried writing this) and then I’ll take a walk because the more I move the faster my body becomes my friend again ๐Ÿ™‚

Published on facebook 25-09-15

Friends or not

A little while ago I read an article about friendships – how to recognise a good friend and how to recognise the friends that might not be a friend in the end. The article was very thought-provoking because since April 2011 I’ve really seen who my real friends are from the group of people I considered my social circle. It was amazing to see how people changed because suddenly I was the one who needed help and I didn’t have the energy to care for others in the same degree as before.

In all – Right now I’ve a very little but exclusive group of people I consider friends and they are the ones that I know care about me. The support I’ve got the last 4,5 years has been priceless even if it’s long distance (by phone or computer) since I live in Norway now.

I don’t blame any of the so called friends who I’ve lost because I was the one letting them use me. In all I’ve been really good at becoming friends with people who liked me because I was the one to fall back on when nothing else worked. I’ve had people I called friends who only contacted me when they needed to “throw up” and when all was good I didn’t hear from them. The last part was annoying but I did gain from the friendships because it made me feel important to a certain degree.

The few friends I’ve left now are real friends no matter what and distance. In some awkward way I love that this has happened even if I feel pretty lonely a lot of the time. The good thing is that I’m open to new people and the type of people I want to attract now are quiet different from before. The most important factor are positive people ๐Ÿ™‚

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